an open letter to interns everywhere

Dear Interns,

When I can hear the :CLOMP, CLAMP: of your hollow-heeled shoes through the hallway over the buzzing of my own witty inner-monologue, it means your shoes are TOO DAMN CLUNKY. That is all.

Regards,

Someone-who-already-has-two-nemesis'-so-let's-not-make-it-three.


Note: In response to this open letter my sister-in-law (who is neither an intern, nor anyone else living with the results of poor footwear choices, i.e., she has killer shoes, too) quipped, "You recognize that you are, in fact, a completely insane person, yes?" I may be insane, but at least my shoes are fabulous. The intern population at large could learn a lesson or two from my shoe collection. So there.

mohegan sun

Setting: The Dubliner pub in Mohegan Sun casino AFTER dancing on stage with Chubby Checker at his free concert (i.e., I was more than a little hyper, which as everyone knows, never leads to good things) with "The Girls" (my crew of girlfriends from high school who are the coolest and most-willing-to-get-into-crazy-shenanigans-while-also-putting-up-with-my-nonsense gals a psychotic red-head could ever want to associate with, AKA "The Pea Coat Mafia.")

We enter the crowded pub and head straight for the bar, where immediately Some Dude buys us drinks because he found out he's from three towns away from us and, "Small world!" OR, this is one of the only two fun places to go within a 300 mile radius of Our Town, and it's raining cats and dogs in NYC. There's probably 50 other people here just from our high school, but whatever Dude, we'll take your free beverages, just don't think that means we're talking to you afterwards. (The Girls are here for The Girls alone, we can entertain ourselves without outside help, as proved by the "Twenty Minutes" ahem, HOUR we waited for our table at Michael Jordan's Sports Cafe in the empty hallway outside the restaurant. But I digress...)

We move away from Some Dude and are immediately approached by Blonde Guy, who wants to take a poll.

Blonde Guy: What is sexier on a guy, a chest tattoo, or a navel tattoo?

The Girls: :::confused::: Navel? What do you mean by navel?

Blonde Guy: Yeah, navel. My buddy over there (pointing to a guy wearing sunglasses in a dark pub at night, don't get me started) has Celtic knots all around his belly button.

The Girls: :::shock::: Um, definitely chest.

Blonde Guy: :::looking victorious:::

Kara: Wait a minute... It depends, does your buddy like boys, or girls?

Blonde Guy & The Girls: :::laughter:::

Kara: I'm SERIOUS, people...

Blonde Guy: He likes girls.

Kara: Oh, yeah, definitely the chest. A belly-button tattoo is totally girly.

Blonde Guy & The Girls: :::more laughter:::

Blonde Guy then returns to his effeminately-tattooed Buddy to recount his findings, as we grab ourselves a table. I spend the rest of the evening dodging death stares from certain effeminately-tattooed people; in between what I'm sure were snorting runs to the men's room every 15 minutes. Later, a drunk lady-friend of the effeminately-tattooed "accidentally" spills ice all over Suzie and we take that as our cue to leave (it was either that or the Bachelor party that was hitting on the group at large, I can't remember.)

I'm sorry to all of the accidentally effeminately-tattooed straight men out there if I've offended you, but these are the kinds of polls one takes BEFORE one permanently alters one's body in what may be construed as a terrifically girly fashion. Duh.

holy cool crap!

I stumbled upon a new-to-me shopping site that houses the most fantastically ridiculous and utterly useless stuff-- Perpetual Kid.

Where else can you find a dog bum towel holder, a Hillary nutcracker and a VooDoo knife set?

Some of my other favorites include: a guide to the world's religions, fantastic pens, memos, an amusing measuring cup and some really marvelous sticky notes:


I already have half of my Christmas list together!

woo!

The upcoming Fall TV schedule is out, and a very busy fall it will be, indeed! The DVR might implode on Monday's and Wednesday's, but oh how entertaining it will be!

I don't think we're trying out many new shows this season, there doesn't look to be a whole lot out there that's worth watching. Just these few:

Kath & Kim: This is based on an Aussie comedy of the same name, Bryan got them for us to watch after the commercials for the new show nearly made me wet my pants.

Do Not Disturb: Jerry O'Connell from Carpoolers (yes, it was canceled, sad indeed) and Niecy Nash from Reno 911!, how could this fail to be funny?

Fringe: A Sci-Fi Drama with Pacey Witter in it? Count me in.

90210: It may be blasphemous, but come on! Brenda and Kelly are back as guidance counselors? Even if there's only one cat fight per season, it'll be worth the teen angst.

It's shaping up to be a fabulous fall! And even if they cancel everything I love, Joss is coming out with a new show, Dollhouse, this winter! I may do cartwheels out of sheer excitement. Hooray!

One last note, here's one I may have to watch just to see it with my own eyes, Hole in the Wall. Words can't do it justice, you must watch a clip from the original Japanese version:

Crazy Japanese Game Show
Uploaded by exoticcartoday

Right? I know.

spinach strawberry salad

After being told that I was far too old to jump in the giant strawberry bouncy house at my local farmer's market's Strawberry Festival a few weeks ago, I picked up a recipe as a consullation prize. Turns out it was WAY better than I had expected.

Spinach Strawberry Salad

• 1/2 c. sugar
• 1 Tbs. poppy seeds
• 2 Tbs. sesame seeds
  
• 1 1/2 tsp. minced onion
• 1/4 tsp. paprika
• 1/4 c. cider vinegar
  
• 1/4 c. wine vinegar
• 1/2 c. canola oil
• 2 Tbs. butter
• 3/4 c. slivered almonds
• 1 lb. baby spinach, washed and dried
• 1 pint strawberries, sliced

1) Put sugar, seeds, onions, paprika, vinegars and oil in shaker jar. Shake to emulsify.

2) Melt butter in skillet over medium heat. Add almonds; cook and stir until lightly toasted, 2-3 minutes. Remove from heat and set aside to cool.

3) Combine spinach, strawberries and almonds in serving bowl. Pour half of dressing over and toss. Add more dressing as desired. Serve and enjoy!

(Makes 8 servings.)

m.i.a.

I apologize for my recent absence from bloggerville, but after a very trying "busy season" at work, I've been doing my best to do absolutely nothing, and have succeeded.

Right now the fourth season of So You Think You Can Dance is on, and with the new season of Big Love being pushed back to January 2009 (don't even get me started,) that's about the only thing on TV worth paying attention to, leaving me high and dry for the vast majority of the week. So, in another attempt to bolster my TV repertoire, I have begun to watch shows that I missed, skipped, or never got in to.

As a fanatic of Joss Whedon's Buffy the Vampire Slayer, I started with his short-lived series, Firefly. A mere 14 episodes and feature film later, I was in love and left with no where to turn. So I watched it again. Yet more sadness filled me as I realized that it aired long before it's time. Sigh. Move on, Kara.

My mom is a big fan of Brothers and Sisters, and I saw a random episode while visiting her one Sunday, so I thought I'd give it a shot. Two seasons of this drama later, I realize that everything can be solved in a 60 minute episode, and it seems to have more love triangles than 90210. Still worth watching, for now.

People have been telling me that 30 Rock is "awesome," and that they "can't believe" I'm not watching it already. Well, I made it halfway through the first season and gave up. I generally adore Tina Fey, and I love Alec Baldwin, it's everyone else that I hate. I returned the second half of the season to Netflix without even opening the envelopes.

I had heard from a friend that Dexter was "twisted and dark," which sounded like something I'd enjoy. It's a seriously messed up show, but I love it. I just finished the second season and can't wait for number three this fall.

Now I'm moving on to Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles. I've heard that it's awful and that it's great, but with both Summer Glau (from the aforementioned Firefly) and Lena Headly (from 300) in it's roster, I have to give it a shot. Here's hoping!

devil's food cookies

A friend made these delicious cookies for a recent gathering and I just about died and went to heaven while eating them. Imagine all the deliciousness of a Devil's Food Cake in the convenience of a cookie! Marvelous, I tell you.

The recipe is from The Food Network, and its hella easy. Behold: (italicized items were left out of my recipe according to my personal preferences.)

• 1 box devil's food cake mix
• 2 eggs
• 1/4 cup water or hot coffee
• 1/2 cup vegetable oil
• 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
• 1 cup semi-sweet chocolate chips
• 1 cup chopped pecans
• 3/4 cup bits of chocolate-toffee candy

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.

Combine cake mix, eggs, water, oil and flour in large bowl. Beat on low speed until all ingredients are moistened, then beat on high speed for 2 minutes. Dough will be sticky. Fold in chips, nuts and candy until evenly distributed. Drop by heaping tablespoonfuls onto ungreased baking sheet, spacing 2 inches apart.

Bake for 12 to 14 minutes. Let the cookies cool for 4 to 5 minutes until firm. Serve slightly warm or store in an airtight container for up to 2 weeks (not that they'll last that long.) Enjoy!

long time no blog

Good Lord, it's been ages. I promise we're still alive, just terribly busy. I plan on blogging more in the near future, as soon as things at work and home calm down a bit. Some things that have been happening:

• Guinness: He's been sick for a while, he caught some nasty stomach bug from another dog at camp and has been messing all over the house for about a week and a half now. I think we alone are keeping the Vet in business. He seems to be doing better though, thank God.
• Cars: We both got new cars in the past month. We were terribly excited to begin with, and after remembering what a pain in the ass it is to car shop, we finally got it over with. I ended up with a Pilot and Bryan got a Sonata. I think we're banned from both Sales floors as a result of the insane deals we got on both. Bryan drives a hard bargain.
  
• Work: We've been working like crazy, Bryan more than me (to say the very least.) I'm not sure he's had a day off since Christmas...
• Home: The house is a total disaster area as a result of all of the above, and I can't remember the last time I did laundry. I'm either going to have to go buy us new wardrobes this week, or remember where the washer is, stat.

Suffice it to say, it's been a bit insane. We both need naps, or maybe just straight hibernation for a bit.

post secret

Post Secret is one of my favorite websites, (as you can see to your left) and I've been trying to come up with something good to share and send in. I finally thought of something and created (what I think is) a great visual rendition of my secret. Unfortunately, it's not really a secret, (several people know, actually) and sending it in would be violating one of the only rules of the website, "Reveal anything - as long as it is true and you have never shared it with anyone before."

I decided not to send it in. I sent it to Bryan. He passed it around to his work buddies. They taped it to their walls. So if they can see it, so can you. Enjoy.



Yes, it really is.

new life plan

I think I'm going to quit my job. Don't worry, this isn't a rash decision, I've got it all planned out.

This morning on my way in to work (yes, I had to work on a Saturday, vomit) I was craving some delicious Baked Potato Soup from Panera Bread, so I had to drive all the way out to East Greenbush to get some. It was either that, or drive to Schenectady or Latham. How absurd is it that there isn't a Panera in Albany? I'll tell you. VERY absurd.

So, the new plan, first wave:

• Quit job;
• Open Panera franchise in Empire State Plaza; and
• Help State workers become fatter and more listless.

The second wave of my plan involves either petitioning Panera HQ to serve Baked Potato Soup every day of the week (you can only get it on a Monday, Wednesday or Saturday) or just throwing the rules out the window and being the only franchise to have it ever-available. I can't decide which is better... Either way it's total rubbish that you can get Broccoli effing Cheddar every day and they horde the precious Baked Potato concoction for three measly days a week. Rubbish, I say.

So, there you have it. New life plan. Good, eh?